Benefits of Being Apart And Missing Someone

I am a professional when it comes to being apart and missing people. Having lived abroad away from my family and friends and having had a relationship with a partner who traveled pretty much every 2 weeks have all taught me patience and appreciation for the fact that I have someone worth missing in my life.

I’ve even learned to love the process of missing someone. Yeah, I know, some of you are like “How the hell can anyone enjoy missing someone?!” But it’s actually not that bad when you really think about it.

There are multiple benefits in taking a break from a relationship or just spending time apart. Especially when you’re in a situation where circumstances like work or family issues force you to spend time away from your partner often. Then it’s vital that you both keep in mind the positive aspects of it.

So, let’s dive into what those benefits of being apart could be!

Check Out My Podcast

Benefits of Being Apart And Missing Someone

If you spend all your time (excluding work) with your significant other it very easily and quite subconsciously becomes something that you both take for granted. In the end this can lead to a partnership with no significant emotions involved.

But when you are apart for even couple of days you suddenly realize all the little things that being with your partner brings to your everyday life. So, here are the benefits that being apart can bring:

Appreciation for ‘the little things’

The ‘little things’ in life, that at the end of the day matter the most, are the ones we tend to ignore. Things like a cup of strong coffee in the morning or being able to spend some time in nature every single day seem like an automatic part of living a life.

But if you ever lose the ability or possibility to have those little things in your life, you’ll immediately notice the impact. The most important thing that we take for granted, even though we definitely shouldn’t, are our bodies:

• A human body is an incredigle system.
• No matter how badly we treat it, it will go to incredible lengths to keep us alive.
• And still we punish it with unhealthy diets or by pumping toxic substances into it.
• When that body has finally had enough, you will appreciate everything it did, gave and made possible for you. Is it going to be too late, though?

This same thing applies to relationships. Being apart with your partner makes you notice the little things that you either never paid attention to, or that even annoyed you.

For example, those dirty socks lying on the couch every day when you arrive home from work start to seem endearing rather than annoying when they are all of a sudden missing…

Better problem solving skills

What I’ve noticed in my relationships is that being apart sometimes helps us to solve problems that could in the long run become much bigger issues. This applies to both family and romantic relationships.

1. When you’re with someone 24/7 it’s hard to find a moment to talk about something serious that you have wanted to discuss.
2. But when there are periods apart you realize that those moments are even more rare, which prompts you to take the initiative.

You tend to think the issue through more carefully because you’ve got all the time to do so, being on your own for a change. And by thinking the whole thing through it’s easier to put it on the table in a calm manner with facts straight up and the point delivered clearly.

This should always be the way to do it with men especially: keep it simple! Don’t talk around the subject, be straight and true. Emotional intimacy is a skill on both sides that helps a lot with all of that.

Otherwise you end up in a fight because one of you misunderstood something or got annoyed because they can’t get to the bottom of what you really want to say. Been there, done that. Not recommended.

Reduced stress levels

When you’re left to fend for yourself for a while, you come to realize that your stress levels tend to reduce.

This does not mean that there’s anything wrong with your relationship because there is also good kind of stress. Instead it just means that when you’re with that significant other you think about their needs and wants 24/7 as well as your own.

But when you have time just for yourself you don’t need to consider anyone else, you can just do you; watch that soap on Netflix that he hates, eat exactly what you want and look as dreadful as you like.

OK, this last point isn’t an issue for everyone but I like to at least wear bearable-looking clothes at home instead of a onesie with my hair and face fucked up. My partners have never asked me to do so, it’s just my way of showing him as much as myself consideration by wanting to look good.

Many people who live a “normal” living-together-life where neither of them needs to be away often, can easily become unhealthily dependent on their significant other. Thus, being apart can bring out sides in us that we weren’t aware of.

If suddenly the partner needs to be away for a weekend and you notice a lot of stress and apprehension, perhaps even suspicion of foul play, that’s when we need to learn the next point:

Enhancing and embracing your independence

Taking just a weekend apart every now and then makes sure that you don’t become too ‘needy’ and are able to keep your independent mind. This ensures that if something bad happened, you would still be able to cope.

Stable communication is always recommended for everyone’s mental stability’s sake but if, for whatever reason, there is a break in communication, it’s not going to kill you! In most cases there is a perfectly valid reason, and you will find it out eventually. In the meanwhile, prioritize yourself.

Of course this is a lot easier if you, like me, are an independent person: most of my life I’ve been completely dependent on myself and nobody else. Thus, being apart for long periods of time is no biggie.

We can’t slide over the fact that being able to trust your partner plays a massive role in this. If there is no trust to speak of, then your relationship is on very unstable bearings, I’m not going to lie.

Openness is the key for everything: It creates trust and without trust there is no relationship.

Being Apart – Conclusion

Being apart and missing someone actually has a lot of benefits to it. As long as your relationship has a strong foundation! Let’s not kid a kiddo, an unstable, even abusive relationship is one that brings no benefit of any sort to any aspect of your life.

But when the relationship itself is sound and communication functions well, there is so much goodness you can learn about yourself and your relationship while you two are apart.

No matter how great your relationship is, I still urge y’all to never forget the Number One: You ♥